Chapter 9: I Need you?

That night I didn´t dream of Frank. I dreamed of Carrie.

She was on the floor, her face pale.
“Carrie, Carrie!! Don´t leave me!”
She touched my face gently and said something I didn´t understand. I looked down at her and saw blood.
“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

“Anthony! You´re okay,” My mom was in my room, holding me. I was drenched in a cold sweat.
I just held her back.
“I´m not o –fucking-kay, mom.”
“It´s okay honey,” I put a hand over my mouth; where did that come from?
“It was just a dream,” She whispered again.

A dream.
Just a dream.
Since when were my dreams just dreams?

The next day, I was thinking about the dream as I entered school. I noticed a lot of people where noticing me now, looking and even saying hi.
When did all this all happen? You punch a dick in the face and this happens.
I went to my French art class but there was no sign of Carrie.

“Can I borrow your pencil?”. Said a girl in Influential artists of the 20th century, my class after French art. She smiled at me.

Flirting? No way.

At lunch time a small guy said hello to me.
“You´re Anthony right?”
I just nodded and walked away from him.
“Good move at the party!” He screamed as I was walking away.

I went to my tree, and she was there. I could not ignore the feeling of relief I had when I saw her sitting there, her pink hair and big glasses, her lip split. She was drinking a coffee; I sat in front of her.
“Carrie?”
She turned in my direction.
“Hey” She took of the glasses. Black eye.

Asshole.

She was smiling, but her eyes didn’t show it.
“How are you?”
“I´m great, listen, I´ve been thinking, and I think you should continue this on your own.”
“What?” I panicked.
“I´ve already caused you problems with your…….” She thought for a moment , her tone somehow harsh, “….isolation, so..I’m sorry, okay?” She put the glasses on again and stood.
“No!” I panicked even more when I saw she was serious.
“You can´t leave!”
“You can talk to your mirror Anthony,” She said angrily, not even looking at me.
I stood and grabbed her arm.
“I´m sorry about last night, I didn´t mean it, I swear,” she stayed there, listening.
“You´re the only one that understands me right now.”
“Please?” I waited.
“I need you.”

Wow, that was more than I intended.

“You need me?” Her voice was soft, almost a whisper.
“No one has ever needed me before.”
“Well, I do.”

Did I just say that?

“Please, don’t walk out on me. Everybody has done that before” I took her arm and forced her to face me.
I took her glasses off. She gave a sweet smile.
“I don´t know how to treat people, I’m sorry.”
She smiled again. I felt a lump inside but ignored it, maybe I was hungry.
“I´m sure your mum hasn´t given up on you,” she said, a little bit serious again.
I smiled, “Yeah, you´re right”.
“So?”
She rolled her eyes and smiled in the way I knew she smiled.
She sat again.
“Shoot”.
“What?” I sat too.
“Dreams?”
I froze. I had forgotten the last dream.
“No dreams,” I lied

The fearful expression of Carrie in my dream sent me chills all down my spine. She died in my dream. I´m sure she died. I wanted to think that it was probably a game of my subconscious for the previous fight, trying to find some logic in all this shit.
“Okay, so I had an idea” She drank more of her coffee and handed me the cup, I drank and smiled as the bittersweet taste invaded my senses.
“I was searching the other day on the internet and found the hospital where Frank died.”
I opened my eyes wide. “And?”
“We can go there, and find out more, maybe talk with the doctor that was doing the operation.”
“That´s crazy-”
“Frank, want you to” She looked at me “ Why would he show the operation part if there was nothing to it?”
“He showed me previous parts to that. He showed me Gerard.”
“Yeah, searching for Gerard is more difficult now, so we have to find out more about how he died.”
“He died because the operation was risky.”
“Yeah, but still,” She insisted.
“And where is this hospital?”
“In New York.”
I spit out the coffee I had brought from the cafeteria.
“NEW YORK?”
“Yeah” she said pretty calmly.
“I can buy the plane tickets today, we´ll be there tomorrow morning, if we leave early “ She said very seriously, looking like she had it all planned.
“We talk to the hospital and will be back by that night, and maybe we could have time to seeing the Empire-“
“Hey, I´m not going to New York and neither are you, we have classes.”
“This weekend then”
“Hopeless” I said under my breath.
“You don´t have classes on Friday, we can take…” she thought for a second ”… yeah, stay Friday..Till Sunday.”
“You´re insane,” I smiled at her.
“I don´t have the money,” I said, trying to make a last minute excuse.
“I do. I´m sure you´re mum will lend you if your tell her you´re traveling with your new girlfriend.”
“Girlfriend, and that is?”
“Me…..”
“Of course….” I let out a sigh.
“It’s perfect, she always wanted you to have one, so she won´t get mad if you-”
“I´m gay remember!”
“I know, but It´s the perfect cover.”
“I guess I have no choice….”

Chapter 8: I was fine!

We were in her car.
She was bleeding from the nose, so she started to clean it with a tissue I gave her.
We were in silence.
“What was your dream about?”
She was smiling. Fake smiles. I hate them. Pretending everything is okay, when everything is actually fucked up.
Fake smiles. When the joy of a smile doesn’t reach your eyes.

“Don’t change the subject,” I said, annoyed.
“He was raping you or what?”
“He….was drunk. He didn’t mean it, really,” Her voice was low, like a whisper.
“Don’t fucking defend him. He was hurting you!”
Suddenly she started to cry. I didn’t realize she was probably still scared or traumatized.
“I know,” She whispered.
I felt weird.

Don’t cry mommy.
She was sitting in the kitchen.
I gave her a rose I had picked from the garden.
She just took it.

I put my hand on her shoulder.
“Sorry...I…You’re better that this,”
She looked at me still sobbing like a little girl.
“This is not the first time is it?”
He just moved her head in a negative way.
Asshole.
I caressed her head, and she did something nobody had done in at least 8 years.

She hugged me.

I, petrified, didn’t know what to do. The last time someone hugged me was my mother on my 10th birthday.
She hugged me so tight, and didn’t care, I didn’t respond to the hug.
“You’re my hero now,” She whispered into my ear and released me from the hug.
“Can you take me to my apartment?”
I just nodded. I was still in shock.
She started to clean her face again with the tissue.

Carrie lived alone in an apartment near the university. Her parents, as she said, set her free her and sent her money; they didn’t care, they just sent the money.
They thought she was crazy.
We entered and she went to the bathroom and stayed there for about 30 minutes. Her apartment was very messy, clothes all over the place and food here and there.
I sat on the small couch in the living room/kitchen, the bedroom looked small.

“How´s your hand, you want some ice?”
I looked at my hand. It was swollen and red. I didn’t notice that before.
“Yeah I guess,”
“How you feel?” She came and sat next to me on the couch, putting ice in my hand.
“I feel kind of great.”
“You punched him….!”
I smiled at her.
“Yeah.”
The cold of the ice helped with the pain.
“So tell me about your dream.”
“The dream, right.”

I told her everything.
She just listened in silence.
“He´s definitely trying to contacts us, I mean though you. He´s expressing himself through you.”
“But why me?” He thought for a moment.
“We had nothing in common.”
“Don´t know, but he´s telling you about the surgery; he dies in the surgery, remember?”
I just nodded.
“Ask him the next time. In the dream, ask him.”
“Are you crazy?”
She just smiled.
“Well, you are crazy, but I’m not going to talk with a dead guy.”
“And besides…I´m him in the dream, remember…it’s not like I can talk to him.”
“He´s expressing though you, I´ve already told you.”
“Why?”
“Maybe he thinks your life was boring and you needed a twist.”
“A twist?” She shrank her shoulders.
“My life was fine!” I raised my voice.
“I was fine by myself…alone, the world didn’t bother me and I didn´t bother the world.
“I was invisible…” I sighed deeply. ”But now I’m not!”
She just looked down, hurt.

Shit.

“I didn’t mean it like that… I don´t regret …. Knowing you…”
“I understand,” she said.
“No… “I felt bad.
“It´s okay…” She suddenly stood up and pretended a smile. Another fake smile.
“I´m tired, and you must be tired too.”
“Carrie…”
“Good night,” She gave me a kiss on the cheek and left in the direction of her room.
I was left alone on the couch.
I didn’t ask for any of that.
I stood up and left the apartment, I was mad with myself for saying those things, it was true, but I had hurt the only person who got me, or at least listened to me.
Since when do I care what people think?

I was being selfish now. I was only using Carrie. She listened to me, when no one else would believe me.
Who would believe I was dreaming with a dead dude? Who would believe I was becoming the dead dude?!

I went back my house and fell onto my bed. I passed out almost immediately.

Chapter 7 : Daddy, stop please...

“Hi!” a loud sound of music and people were in the background.
“Carrie?”
“Anthony!!!” She screamed, excited.
“Where the hell are you?”
“At a party!! With Paul.” I could hear the music and the laughs.
“What’s wrong..? Another dream?”
“The worst…..He talked to me...”
“What?” She screamed.
“He talked to me!” I yelled a little-.
“I need to talk to you,” I had became dependent on her, she was the only one I could talk to.
“You have a pen?”
She gave me the address. I took my mom’s car. She didn’t object when I told her I was going to a party.

While I was driving I was trying to put my head in order.
They talked about the surgery. I was…I mean Frank, was afraid of the surgery….something went wrong because he didn’t make it. I had to find out more about that surgery. What the hell happened?
Maybe that’s what he want me to do. To find out something about that….

I don’t know why I went to the stupid party; when I entered the room it was full of people.
I hate parties.
I hate people.
Maybe I didn’t want to sleep, afraid of the dreams, or maybe just the idea of talking with Carrie.
I need to talk with her.
The only person who could understand why I was dreaming about a dead person I had nothing in common with and never knew before.
The house was full of people I recognized from the University, of course they don’t know me. I was invisible at the University.
Did I say that I hate people?

I started to move between them, trying to find Carrie.
I approached to a girl and asked for Carrie.
She didn’t know who she was.
“Paul´s girlfriend?” Everybody knew who Paul was, the football star of course.
“They went upstairs.”
“Thanks.”
I went to the second floor of the house. I looked for them but there was no sign of them, only a lot of people drinking and shouting.
I asked another guy.
“Have you seen Paul’s girlfriend? He just nodded his head in the direction of a room.
Shit. Why me?
They were fucking.
I went to closer to the room that was at the end of the corridor. Shit.
I heard a scream. Great-, they were fucking their brains out. Again more screams.
Wait. These weren’t sex screams.

“Stop!” I heard when I went closer.
“Shut up bitch!”
“No. Please…”
I put a ear to the door.
“Stop. You promised,” The sound of something getting broken. It was Carrie’s voice.
I felt a rush of energy going to my body. I opened the door and saw Paul on top of Carrie on the bed. She had blood coming from her noise and her t-shirt was lost on the floor.
“Anthony,” She said in a whisper. I don’t if in relief or concern.

I hear the sound of glass breaking coming for the kitchen; I left my Batman doll to go to the kitchen.
“Mommy?”
My mother was lying on the floor, her noise bleeding. My father was on the top of her.
“Anthony,” She whispered.


“You call him?”
He stood up and looked at Carrie.
“No”. She grabbed his arm, trying to stop a fight. “Just go, Anthony, I’m fine.”
“You’re not fine.”
I was yelling. I was so mad. She grabbed Paul’s shoulders, his whole body was coming in my direction, to punch me no doubt.
“Shut up bitch,” he hit her again, making her lose her balance…

“I´m fine, go to your room,” The weak voice of my mother shook me.
“Daddy, stop please!” My father stood and came closer to me. He raised his hand, ready to punch me. I just closed my eyes waiting for the hit.
“No!” My mother put herself in the middle.
“Please.”
He hit her again and she fell to the floor.


I punch him in the face so hard, like I never did before. I was not only punching Paul. I was punching my father. He was the one that now lose his balance, he didn’t expect that form the queer of the class.
“Anthony!” I heard Carrie’s voice.
“Fuck that hurt. Are you okay?”
“You son of a bitch. He punched me into the wall next to the night table…He was squeezing my throat., I tried to let go, but He was stronger. …. I heard Carrie yell. I took a lamp form the night table and crashed it onto his head. He realized me. It took me couple of seconds to regain my breath again. There were people at the door.
“Are you okay?”
I just nodded. Carrie picked up her t-shirt.
“Let’s go”. She said, I grabbed her hand and we left the house.

Chapter 6: Forever

I was afraid to sleep that night. It was early on a Saturday night.
I started to think of my present life, how different it was from my life just a couple of weeks ago. Not talking to anybody, alone in my own private world. Never excited for anything, never anxious or worried, only thinking in a way to die. I never had that cheer for life, never. I was always the quitet kid at school. Never like anyone. I only had sex once. And it was the most awful experience in my life. It was a girl, her name was Carla. Beautiful, but the night when all wrong. I didn’t feel anything and it lasted less than a minute. So after that decided I was gay, I had to be.
A knock on the door took me away from remembering that horrendous experience.

“Anthony?” It was mom.
“Yeah, mom?”
“Can I come in?”
“Sure,” I was reading a book and laying on my bed.
“Aren’t you going to go out?” She said, hope in her voice. She had that tone of hope a lot lately; since my change.
“Nope.”
“But it’s Saturday.”
“I know,” I didn’t look at her, I pretended to read the book.
“I thought maybe that girl. Carrie…”
“She’s just a girl. With a boyfriend.” I don’t why I emphasized that.
“Oh. Okay,” She said, sounding disappointed.
“Good night then.”
“Night,” I said with looking at her.

Poor mom, she thinks that I’m recovering, I would never recover.
Life makes no sense, it’s like a boring thing you have to pass, a painful path. Why should I meet people, make friends? They all leave in the end; they all hurt you in the end.
I was forced to do sports by my father, I hated it. Then forced to play guitar, and I hated it, then drama, fucking hate it. He wasn’t going to relax until I was doing something with my life. He didn’t understand I wasn’t planning on doing anything; I was at peace with my books. Alone, because nobody liked the thing I liked.

Only my art, art history, but I had never even been that excited to work in it. I’m just studying because is interesting.
The doctor had said it was depression, depression, I’ve never been depressed, just not interested. Maybe life is not for everyone. I hate therapy. I have pills and antidepressants, and they never help me at all.

My mom thought it was her fault; she got pregnant when she was 15 and tried to abort me. Well, my dad tried to make her abort me. But don’t ask why they got married at the end. She never talked of my dad. We never talk of him.

These dreams had strongly changed me in some way. I was interested in something. According to Carrie, my eyes looked different. And my smile was cute. Sometimes I felt like jumping or running. Or even talking to people, well, not people, actually just Carrie. The weird girl got me, in some strange way.

Finally I started to feel my eyes getting tired, all this thinking, that I usually didn’t do, about my life and my future, had tired me.
Not another dream about the dead guy, not a dream about the dead guy. Frank. Gerard. No No No No…

"I’ve missed you," A voice said, almost in a whisper.
I kissed his chest and rested my head there.
Clouds, I’m in heaven.
And not even dead yet.
Dead.
I don’t want to die now. Not now.
Afraid.
A bad movement, a bad judgment in a second, and I'll be dead tomorrow.
Dead and far away from Gerard.
Forever.

A blur came.
A car. I looked of into the distance.
"Don't make me go," I held him. "How do you know everything is going to be okay?!"He pressed my forehead against mine, taking my face in his hands.
"Because God can be that evil."
God was evil, with us.
His hand caressing my check.
"He made us part once. He can't separate us again."
A burn on my front, his kiss, his lips burn.
"It's our time." His voice.
I love you Gerard.
I don’t want to die.
"You're going to get out of this hospital like new, we're going to record the album and then go on tour, we're going to have sex on Mikey's bunk."
Water in my eyes. I’m crying, but I’m laughing. How is it that you always made me laugh?
"And it's going to be you and me."
"Always?" I hear my voice, it’s shaking.
"Forever babe."
Forever.
Forever.
Forever.
Forever.
Forever.
Forever.
Forever.
Forever.

No…I opened my eyes to see the clock on my wall, 10 pm.
God! That more real that anything.
I was thinking was he was thinking.
I covered my self with the blanket, I had this strange feeling, like a cold in my back.
Like I was scared of dying, scared of the surgery.
I felt my own tears coming.
Tears?
I don’t cry!
Fuck. I searched for my cell phone. Carrie’s number. I don’t want to die.
I wasn’t supposed to die.
Carrie’s number

Chapter 5: His name was Frank

“My Chemical Romance?”
“This is getting weirder by the second,” She took a sip of her coffee.
“It all fits, the song. Gerard.” She thought for a moment. “He is the lead singer. You said you hear: Blow me Toro. Ray Toro the guitar player. Lin-z is not in town? Lind-z is Gerard’s wife,” Her eyes had a spark of excitement.
“Okay slow down. I was having sex with this guy and he’s married?” I felt a strong rush of jealousy.
“Yep.”
“How do you know so much, did you read it from that page?”
She smiled sadly. “I liked this band. They split apart after… “Suddenly her eyes grew bigger than I had ever seen before.
“God!”
“What?”
“It can’t be!!!!!!! Fuck!!!!” Her hand was on her mouth. “No fucking way!” She screamed.
People were now looking at us.
“Hey, lower your voice. What is it?”
She punched herself on the forehead with her hand. “I didn’t see it before. But it was impossible to imagine!”
She was now smiling.
“Could you please explain this to me?”
She turned the computer to her again.
“My Chemical Romance, the rock band, they where great, like great and very famous, like Ghostbusters famous!” She started to explain as she was typing on the laptop.
“So…they split up after the death of this guitar player. He died during an operation, he had a car accident” She looked seriously at the computer. I didn’t know why but my heart started to beat faster and harder.
“And…?”
“His name was Frank.”
“Ouch,” I felt this strong pain in my chest.
“Anthony? Are you okay?”
“I think so…My chest hurts….”
She looked at me, worried. I tried to breathe deeply and the pain started to go down.
“Here. Frank Iero” She turned the computer again.
A small guy appeared. He had black and straight hair. Bright eyes, like Carrie’s, lots of tattoos, white and skinny. He had a lip ring and was smiling.
“Frank.” I said slowly, understanding.
“Listen. He was a coffee addict and vegetarian.”
I froze. I felt a cold wave going down my spine. “But that can be coincidences.”
She ignored me.
“Always smiling,” She turned the computer again and started to type.
“It….cannot ….”
“He died almost two years ago, in two weeks it will be two years.”
“Fuck.” I was in shock. Why I was dreaming about a dead guy? Correction: why I was a dead guy in the dreams?
“Yeah, billions of fucks.”
“But he and the Gerard guy, we were, they were….” I said, scared at the realization.
She thought for moment.
“There were always rumors about Gerard and Frank… but people always thought it was a show…the kisses and the licking,” She said looking at the ceiling.
I felt the cold feeling again.
“Maybe it wasn’t an act.”
“And the wife?” She read something on the monitor.
“He got married in August or September 2007 but got divorced in 2008.”
“Maybe the dream was from after they got divorced,” I tried to think that this Frank guy wasn’t a cheater, and neither was Gerard.
I fell back in the chair.
“You think it’s possible?”
“I don’t even know what exactly is going on,” She crossed her arm over her chest.
“Maybe a possession,” she said in calm voice.
“A possession?” I already imagined me vomiting green stuff.
“You’re feeling like him and like things he liked.”
“Now I feel sick.”
“This is too much for one day,” She put her laptop inside her bag and we left the place.
Her phone started to ring.
“Shit.”
“What?” I still felt dizzy as we were going to her car.
“Nothing, it’s Paul.”
She pressed a button and the cell phone went dead.
“He’s not exactly a gentleman is he?”
“He’s….”
“An idiot.”
“No, he’s not….”
“It doesn’t matter; it’s your life.”
She looked at me sadly.
“Yeah,” She just looked at nothing for a second before turning the engine on, and driving to my home.
Frank Iero. I kept repeating the name in my head. Gerard Way.
I remembered the dream and my body shivered, his touch, the kisses on my neck.
“So what are you going to do?” Carrie’s voice brought me back to reality.
“Don’t know.”
“I think we should find out more about him.”
“We don’t even know what’s happening.”
“He’s inside you, or trying to communicate though you.” She said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. ”We need to know how he died exactly, and try to find Gerard.”
“What??!!!” I screamed.
“And tell him what? Hey Gerard your dead friend Frank is in my dreams and he’s probably trying to possesses me.”
“Obviously he´s trying to communicate something, he’s only showing you memories with Gerard.”
“Read the sings Anthony.”
“I read the sings, but my signs are different than yours.” I sighed. “Mine tell me, go to therapy.”

Chapter 4: My Chemical Romance

“Hi!” A cheery voice greeted me. I knew who it was, and to my surprise I was happy to see her. She was the only person on the planet that didn’t think I was a freak or that was insane. Not that it matters what people think of me. In fact, they don’t even notice me and I had grown used to this.
“How are you?”
I just moved my head.
“C’mon, you can tell me after classes.” She laid her hand on my shoulder in proof of her statement.
“Carrie!” I heard a big voice came from the back.
“Damn.” She whispered.
“Where the hell have you been?”
The boyfriend approached. Her big and popular boyfriend. Paul was on the American Football team and member of the Omega Alpha fraternity.
“Paul…” I saw something in her eyes I haven’t seen before. Fear.
“I …” He took her by the arm and pulled her along with him. He didn’t even notice me. She just had time to wave at me.
“Impossible,” I whispered and entered my class.
She didn’t come to classes the whole day. All I could think about was the dream. The last one had been way too realistic.
I started to get worried; she was the only one I could talk to.
An hour after lunch I was walking my way home.
I didn’t have a car, Mom was afraid I would try to crash the car against something and die.
She had reason to protect me; I had tried to kill myself before.
I couldn’t die now; I had to find out what the hell was happening.

“Anthony!” I heard my name being called.
“Wait!” I turned around to see Carrie.
“What happened?”
“Nothing I’m fine.”
She looked different, like worried.
“Let’s go.”
“What?”
“C’mon.” She pulled and took me to the parking lot, where we got in her car. The trip was silent. We stopped at a Starbucks.

“So tell me.”
I told her everything. Except the graphicness of the last dream.
“And now I have the song stuck in my head.”
“Do you think it’s a real song?” She asked, looking calmer now.
“The dream seemed pretty real,” I was playing in a fucking concert.
She grinned at me.
“What?”
“That’s the first time I heard you said the word Fuck…” she giggled.
I just rolled my eyes.
“Do you remember the lyrics?”
She pulled out her laptop form her backpack.
“I´m not okay. You wear me out. The… it was a part I forget about…something…the photograph…”She entered the entire thing. “I have never heard it before.”
“Okay let’s see.”
A couple of seconds later, she was reading something from the screen. She clicked a couple of more times.
“Uhmmmm,” She kept looking.
“So…?”
“Anything else, you want to tell me?”
“I know the name of the guy I always see…Gerard.” She typed the name.
“Gerard?”
“Yep.”
She looked at me seriously.
“Is he pale?”
“Yeah.”
“Dark and greasy hair?”
“Yes!”
“Kind of choppy?”
“How…..?”
She turned out the computer and I almost screamed when I saw a picture of the guy.
“My Chemical Romance sound familiar to you?”
I felt a jump in my heart and my head spinning around. I felt happy for some strange reason even thought the name didn’t ring a bell for me

Chapter 3: Trust me

Screams.
Heat.
Lights.
My hand was moving fast and I was hot.
The lights made me sweat.
I´m not okay….
I heard a familiar voice in the background singing.
I was playing my white guitar, my new favorite. I couldn’t believe I knew the notes.
I´m not okaaaaay….
The voice continued.
I felt my body moving with the music and the screams.
You wear me out…..
Whoaaa!!!
Suddenly my head was bouncing up and down as the music continued playing.
I could feel my adrenaline going up as the male figure that was singing approached me.
I kept playing, streaming my fingers to the chords.
Blow me Toro! The voice screamed. Suddenly I felt his body against mine. Back to back. I kept playing. But a feeling of tremendous happiness overcame me.
A guitar solo came, it was amazing. The crowd was being driven crazy…..
Forget a about the dirty looks, the photographs your boyfriend took. You said you read me like a book but the pages all were torn and frayed.
Then I stop.
I´m okay….I´m okaaaaaaaaaaaaaay….
Again playing….The voice screamed…
I’m okay now.
He kept giving me the back.
But you really need to listen to me, because I’m telling you the truth…I promise, I’m okay!......
TRUST ME!
“Anthony, are you okay honey?” It was my mom on the otherside of the door. Apparently I woke up screaming. She sounded worried.
“Yeah,” I cleaned myself of the sweat.
“Let me in please,” She sounded like about to cry. “Please, why did you scream trust me? I trust you honey.”
I stood on the bed, her words crushing me.
“I’m fine mom.”
Silence.
“Okay,” I heard her footsteps.
I was okay. I’m not okay.
God, this was weirder by the second.

I laid on bed for a second, trying to relax. After a couple of minutes I fell asleep again.
His body upon me. I could feel the pressure. His hand wandering under my shirt.
I heard a moan, but it wasn’t him, it was me moaning out of pleasure. I could feel my body reacting. His lips were against my skin, kissing and biting tenderly on my neck.
He said something but I didn’t understand. I was more worried that his shirt was still on his body. I started to pull it off. He helped me and took it off. I could see his perfect face. Pale, hazel eyes looking at me, passion in his eyes.
“There is no hurry. Lind-z is out of town, remember?” His voice was beautiful.
He smiled before attacking my lips again. I moaned again.
“Gerard…”

I open my eyes.
“Gerard,” I said again. I notice I had a problem under my pajama pants.
I went to the bathroom and fix it.